…the trend setter.
THE BOY-GIRL THING
Girls. We sha have issues at times; that one dey.
I am all for girl power and showing solidarity but when una no try
I’ll be the first to let you know. I believe in a woman’s dignity.
However, how can we keep guys on a ‘long thing’ over and over?
Continue after the slice….
Permit me to advocate for the guy folk here. Have you ever sat down to
ponder what guts it takes a guy to approach a girl? I mean, just
imagine what it is like to see a stranger from across a room or the
street and walk up to her. Personally speaking, I am not a fan of a
guy randomly hitting on a girl but I have to give it to them: no
matter the rubbish the guy may vomit, it takes some serious courage.
Even guys who get to know you through a mutual friend need
self-confidence to make use of that mutual friend to gain your
After this phase comes the chasing. He calls you incessantly yet you
tell him all kinds of things. I know for a fact that girls can have
mood swings and be really rude over the phone. I know at this point
guys are like, “tell them o!” Though there seems to be no excuse for
rudeness but mehn, some guys can really push your buttons. But if the
guy is able to make it through this phase then he has done well.
Some girls like the ‘let’s stay friends’ routine. Others prefer the
‘let’s take it slowly’ pretense or some just go headlong but the point
is that at one time or the other the guy you were initially ‘fronting’
for becomes your boyfriend.
Then there is the phase that determines how the rest of your life
turns out. Is there a purpose for staying with this guy and will he
make me happy in the long run? That is the point of a relationship for
most girls and when she realizes it is just not working, it’s time to
call it quits. This is when you see her putting the guy on a ‘long
thing’ once again. If the relationship is not heading the right way or
playing out the way you want it to why not just call the guy and
sincerely tell him the problem rather than avoiding him, not picking
his calls, making up excuses not to see him or telling him you need a
break when you know you do not intend to get back to where you guys
left off. For me, once I hear that ‘break’ thing, alarm bells begin
ringing in my head.
It is hard at times to look him in the eye and break up, especially if
you really care about him but man up about it (or should I say ‘woman
up’?). Save yourself the time and futile efforts then save him the
anguish as well. He already went through a lot to ask you out (that’s
if you guys followed convention) and now that you want to be
‘unasked’, do it yourself and don’t assume he will add up the ‘clues’
you are giving him because you are the only one who knows what’s best
for you, other than God. Mind you, though you should tell him and get
it over with, remember to be humane about it. Sit him down and calmly
explain, face to face. It is unfair to not be open with guys. Spell
out to them what you want rather than keep ‘posting’ them.
Guys, I bet you like this piece but you should know that I am coming
for you too… really soon.
Author: Angela Umoru